Happy No More...

See this smile? Yeah, we haven't. Not much and not recently anyway. She is not a happy girl right now. She got the mouth guard in and is so miserable. She can't talk and she can't swallow, which makes eating really difficult so she's hungry, and she can't swallow her saliva but she can't spit it out either so she didn't sleep well last night and it has brackets on the outside of her teeth to keep her from sucking her thumb that way and the brackets are digging into her cheeks so she's tired, hungry and in pain. She is one unhappy camper. I don't know if I've ever seen her this miserable. She has cried more in the past couple days than she has in years I think. The orthodontist says it gets easier but I think so far we're all having a hard time believing that. I didn't know it would be so tough to get this thumb sucking guard in, if I'd known it would be so hard I'm not sure I would have gone ahead with it. We're all praying that it is, in fact, going to actually get better.

I took Cosette back into the doctor today and it turns out that either the blockage never actually got better or it's back and bigger at that. So now we get to do gluten-free AND dairy-free. It's not the lactose they're worried about, it's the protein. And they did more blood tests today to rule out other problems. She's been so great every time they've had to draw her blood, I'm really impressed. She doesn't cry and she actually watches them put the needle in and watches the blood fill the vial. She still gets nervous but I think everyone gets nervous getting their blood drawn and she has just been really brave. And she's getting quite proactive about her dietary restrictions, she's always making sure she can eat something before she puts it in her mouth, "Is this gluten-free?" It's still a huge battle to get her to take her medicine, and today the doctor added 2 more laxatives, which means for the next couple days she's going to be getting FOUR different laxatives every day. How that girl is still plugged up on everything she's on is beyond me. But we soldier on and we will get this figured out, even if it kills me (which it has felt a little lately like it just might).

Funny Thing

You cannot tell me that being a cute girl doesn't give you an advantage in life. Debbie walked out of the orthodontist office this afternoon with her arms piled high with extra stuff from them. I've been to that office multiple times now with Isaac and he's a cute kid but he's quiet and he just does not get the same response Debbie gets. They were gushing about her by the time we walked out, "She's so cute, I hope my kids are just like her!" "Wow, she's so tough, I can't believe it!" "You were so brave, here's some extra beach bucks." "Here's a free t-shirt!" "Oh Debbie, I wanted to say hi to you, make sure you get an extra slushie on your way out the door!" Everyone loves her! And you can't blame them, she's happy and giggles when she gets nervous or excited or hurt (come to think of it, she giggles a lot) and people respond really well to that. She just so stinking cheerful, I'm proud to call myself her mother. What's sad to me is that I need an experience like this to be reminded how wonderful she is, I need to stop taking that for granted.

Cosette's 5!!

Cosette is 5 now!

 

 I bought this dog a few weeks ago and it barks and pants and walks and stuff but because I bought it so early we had to store it in our storage closet in our room. The problem is that it's motion sensor activated which apparently also means "light sensor activated" because it would bark at us anytime we turned out the light to leave the room even though it was covered with a blanket. I guess they really wanted to make it life-like?? It was humorous at first but then I was afraid the kids were going to notice so we finally figured out that if we wrapped it in a blanket, shoved it in a black bag, and turned it upside down it would be quiet. It really was funny, we'd go into the storage room to get something and when we'd leave and turn out the light you'd hear this quiet, "rawrf rawrf, pant pant pant."

 I love this buggy!! I knew she wanted one so I found one I like online and then grandma Westerson bought it for her. She loves it. Debbie loves it too. In fact I guess we all did pretty well in choosing Cosette's presents because Debbie can't seem to keep her hands off them. It's killing her that these are Cosette's and not hers.

William and Christopher (but let's be honest, that really means "Aunt Ellen") got Cosette a plush LaLa Loopsy doll with a matching soft blanket. When I went in to check on the girls tonight this is what I found. I think she likes it.

 

We went to the doctor this morning and good news, the doctor feels confident that we've resolved the blockage issue!!! And, she said that because Cosette's test was such a low positive there is a pretty good chance that she doesn't actually have celiac disease! I was so relieved to hear that. We're still doing the gluten free diet for a couple weeks to make sure but I feel hopeful.

Hearing

My children are losing their hearing. That must be it. Or they're getting a little daft. What else could explain this (somewhat) recent phenomenon? I suppose I could be losing my voice. Or my mind. Maybe I only THINK I've asked them to do something when in reality I haven't said a word?!? Maybe I should consult a doctor...
WHY WON'T THEY LISTEN TO ME?!?!?!
I think I'm going to record myself saying something once and then just push play every few minutes until they actually do what I've asked them to do. I'd only really have to record a few phrases.
"Please put your coat on." This one would work almost 75% of the time, I'd just have to substitute out coat and replace it with shoes or clothes or backpack, you name it.
"Focus. Do your homework please." I think I said this to Debbie a minimum of 20 times tonight. No joke.
What's funny to me is that I ask nice and I ask nice and I ask nice and then finally get fed up and yell at them and then they act all surprised and hurt, "Sheez mom, you don't have to yell at us." Uh yeah, apparently I DO have to yell at you.
I try the whole 'make sure they're looking at you' thing but Debbie was looking me in the eye this afternoon and just stared blankly as I asked her no less than 4 times to please get her coat and shoes on. Either I never actually said a word or the light was on but nobody was home. Or maybe my frequency is off, maybe there's something wrong with my voice and it's not their fault, their ears just aren't tuned to hear me.
So, the only logical conclusion is that something is medically wrong with one of us.

Good to Go!

Isaac got his mask today. We won't put it on him for a couple days so he can get used to having the device in his mouth, but we have it now and can start in a few days! The orthodontist is going to have us turn the retainer a few times to widen up Isaac's jaw a little but I don't think we'll have to do much that way.

 

Debbie got x-rays and pictures taken today and has spacers in now in preparation for getting what they call a "habit guard" to help her stop sucking her thumb.

Life has gotten so busy lately, I don't understand how moms with a lot of kids do it. I keep thinking to myself, "I only have 3 kids, and they're still young, why am I so busy!?!" I feel like I spend half the day in the car, driving kids to and from school and then to and from doctors appointments and whatever else we have going on, my days just fill up so fast, and we don't even have extra-curricular's to worry about! But as much as I complain I really wouldn't change a thing. I figure being so busy is just a witness to how blessed we are and I wouldn't trade these kids for the world. Seriously, not a one (even though some days I may profess different).
I went to the store last night and bought a bunch of gluten-free food. Wow, that stuff is expensive. Chad and I had decided to just try the gluten-free diet to see if that helps Cosette and I barely survived today. How do you explain to a 5 year old that basically her entire diet is now off limits to her!?! We had a scene at the mall because she wanted chicken nuggets and chick-fil-a has gluten-free chicken "nuggets." Only they're not really chicken nuggets. I mean, I really appreciate that they're willing to try but it was just grilled chicken cut up into small pieces which would totally work for me but did not go over well with a little girl who had her heart set on actual, breaded chicken nuggets. How do I explain this all to a little girl? "I'm sorry sweetie, you can't have this, even though your brother and sister and friends are eating it and even though you love it and have been eating it your entire life, you can't have it anymore so just eat your plain stuff and watch everyone else eat what you want." And then she just cries, she keeps saying to me, "Mommy, I wish I didn't have this problem." It breaks my heart. And we have such battles over having her take her medicine, I don't know how to do it any better than I'm doing it! I'm so emotionally exhausted. I just pray that she doesn't actually have celiac's. I honestly don't know how I'll survive. She could just be bloated because of the plug that's in there, or maybe it's a lactose thing. I'm thinking it might be worth it to test her on a lactose free diet first to avoid as much misery as we can. But no matter the outcome I will say this, my heart goes out to any mother who has a child on a special diet, I never realized how much work it would be AND IT'S ONLY BEEN ONE DAY. Gaaah! I have nothing to complain about, it's only been a day, who am I to talk?!?

Cosette Update

Just an update on Cosette... Got the test results back for the celiac test and she has a "weak positive." I guess 0-3 is negative, 4-10 is a weak positive, and 10+ is positive, and she came back at a 4. The only way to verify that someone truly has celiac disease it to do a biopsy of the small intestine. Her doctor at the Health Center sent her lab results as well as the doctor's notes on Cosette to the pediatric GE to see if he wants to see Cosette any sooner than the end of April. So we'll wait to see if he wants to get her in sooner and if he's not worried then we'll cut gluten out of her diet to see if it makes a difference. If it does make a difference we'll reintroduce it and if it effects her again then we'll have a diagnosis. I'm kind of irritated because when the nurse read me the lab results she was kind of callous and said that she didn't know if they'd do anything because the number was so low and I was thinking, "do you know what we've gone through?!?!" I figured she wouldn't call the doctor and the doctor gave me her number so I went ahead and called her myself and she was very nice and called the Health Center herself and got things rolling. So, that's what's going on right now.

Dinner of Champions

The kids had butter and popcorn for dinner tonight. Not buttered popcorn. Butter AND popcorn. They scooped out butter into a spoon and then smeared cold butter onto cold popcorn. I was trying not to barf. The question is, is that a better or worse meal than the goldfish and soda Cosette had for lunch yesterday...?
Just don't judge me to my face please. :)

A Child's Take on Evolution

A few weeks ago I was babysitting my friend's kids when I overheard Debbie and her son having this conversation at dinner...
B (The neighbor boy): "Did you know humans came from apes?"
Debbie: [Seriously appalled] "Ummm, no we didn't."
B: "Yes, we came from apes."
D: "I DID NOT come from an ape."
B: "But that's how humans were made."
D: "No it's not. GOD made us. We came from Adam and Eve."
B: "But we came from apes."
D: "How do you know? Did you see it happen?"
B: "Uh... I saw pictures."
D: "But did you SEE it happen???"
B: "Well no... but I've seen pictures."
D: "Then how do you know that's how it happened?"
Haha, I love it! He couldn't back up his arguments after that and I kinda felt bad for the kid but I couldn't be more proud of her, totally sounds like a response I would give. She was very confident and calm. It was fun to listen to and it gave Chad and I an opportunity to talk with the kids about what we believe and explain that they're going to learn about evolution in school but know that we believe something different. I find it interesting that her gut reaction to the basics of evolution was repulsion. Honestly that's my reaction too and while I have other reasons for believing how I do I also feel that the Holy Ghost verifies truth and I feel that we can often judge truth by our initial reaction, that first feeling we get when we hear something, and it's just so interesting to me that a child who has no reason whatsoever to believe one way or another would have such a strong reaction to evolution.

Cosette

Cosette came to me tonight and told me, "I'm really scared of the enema" and then she softly added, "I wish I didn't have this problem." Oh sweet little girl, me too. Me too.
We went to the doctor again today and the good news is that the poop mass is slightly smaller. Which is very, very encouraging. The bad news is we're going to have to keep up with the laxatives and enemas for another week, which is just no fun because they cause so much cramping. The doctor also ordered some blood tests today to test for anemia, hypothyroidism, celiac disease, and another one (I can't remember exactly what it was). Everything but the celiac test came back by this afternoon and everything looked normal. Hopefully we'll know the results from the celiac test by the end of the week.
Cosette's preschool teacher called me today and told me that "Cosette makes [her] laugh every day." She was telling me how impressed she was with how knowledgeable Cosette is about her whole situation. She was laughing because she went to ask Cosette how the doctor went and Cosette was telling her all about the enema and the blockage and she just thought it was funny because she was standing there "having an adult conversation with a 5 year old." Haha, that's our Cosette! She's so stinking smart! That girl doesn't miss a thing, and her comprehension is amazing. She has a killer memory but she doesn't know she's smart so she doesn't show off so she's constantly taking me off guard with her intelligence. I just love this little girl.

Set-back

Well we've had a set-back. Cosette's been having a lot of accidents in preschool lately (both kinds) and yesterday her teacher suggested that I take her in and have her tested for a UTI. So I took her in this morning and thankfully she does not have a UTI. She does however have a very large, hard stool that is sitting in her lower intestines blocking her bowels. Fun.

I'm so grateful for the doctor we saw today, she listened to us and actually paid attention when I expressed concern over the constipation Cosette has struggled with her entire life. SO different from our last visit to the doctor about this issue. That doctor looked at Cosette's chart and saw that her mother had bipolar disorder and promptly diagnosed her with bipolar disorder and sent us on our way with some literature about kids and mental illness. Needless to say I felt blown-off and hopeless so even though we've continued to deal with this I just figured it was pointless to bring her into the doctor because there was either nothing they could do or nothing they would do.

So we suffered and we did the best we could on our own. Until today. Then today this wonderful doctor actually listened. She listened and then did a physical exam and then sent us for an x-ray. And the x-ray showed the mass of stool about 4 inches wide that is backing her up and causing her pain and stomach distention.

So now we're basically going to slam her system with stool softeners and laxatives and hopefully that will break it up and solve the problem. We'll be seeing this doctor weekly until everything is resolved and we have an appointment with a Pediatric GI specialist in case we need to go that route. But I'm praying this will be a relatively easy fix.